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Celebration, Regret, And Remorse

Posted on March 13, 2008 - Filed Under Recreation and Sports

Recently, three events occurred that forced me to experience celebration, regret, and remorse. And as I thought about each one of them, I was able to draw a lesson from each one of them.

Celebration - My teammate, good friend and role model, Mike Fowler, gave an outstanding performance at the ADCC 2007. Mike was able to win two matches against two BJJ legends (Renzo Gracie and Saulo Riberio). This was an amazing accomplishment and I was very happy for and proud of Mike. The lesson here is Mike proves what hard work, commitment to a system, getting a coach, and actually listening to him (unlike me for many years) will do for you. Congrats Mike on an excellent performance and keep up the good work!

Regret - That would describe Gabe Ruediger’s final departure from “The Ultimate Fighter 5″ Reality Show. If you’ve kept up with the show, you’re aware of the plight of Mr. Ruediger and him showing up at the show 20 lbs overweight and as the weeks went on, his inability to lose the weight when it was his turn to fight. The lesson learned is rarely do life situations get bad overnight, but usually over a period of time due to procrastination, neglect, or underestimating a problem because you solved a similar problem in the past. The fact that he didn’t make some different decisions during the weeks prior to him having to fight will haunt him for the rest of his MMA career…if he still desires to have one. It won’t be easy based on the image he created for himself on that show, but if he wants it as badly as he said and is willing to do whatever it takes to get back on track, he can do it. I wish him luck.

Remorse - This describes the feelings that I felt when I heard that BJJ Black Belt and IFL Fighter Jeremy Williams committed suicide. I didn’t know Jeremy personally, but I don’t feel like I had to know him to grieve his loss. He was a BJJ Black Belt and a lifetime martial artist like me and that’s enough. And from the comments that I’ve read about him from his students on the various grappling forums to describe him (inspiration, best friend, big brother, best coach, always available, role-model, hero, one of the best human beings I’ve ever met, and too many other things to list here), I’m sorry I didn’t have an opportunity to know him. He sounded like a fantastic instructor and just a really cool guy to be around. His students prepared a tribute to him on YouTube that showed how much he meant to them at this link:

(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wNiJ2sXyr8o).

The lesson to be learned in this tragedy is we need to love and appreciate the people we care about the most while they’re with us. We should never presume that there will always be a “tomorrow” to see those people that bring joy to our lives daily. Appreciate them today like there is no tomorrow.

To the Williams and Apex JJ Families, I’d like to take this time to extend my sincere condolences and prayers for your loss.

Jeremy, I hope that you have found the peace that you so desperately needed.

Paul M. Greenhill, “The Wise Grappler”, is the creator of The Wise Grappler System and author of The Wise Grappler Ezine, a weekly ezine that provides martial arts training and personal development tips for the older (over 35) and non-traditional martial artists. To learn more about “The Wise Grappler” and to sign up for more FREE tips like these, visit his site at http://www.ihateyoungpunks.com or contact him at paul@thewisegrappler.com.

(c) 2007 Paul M. Greenhill

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